Every leader at some point in their career has uttered these words. It could be for multiple reasons, but we all have, and if you have not, then eventually you will.
We could be running 100/mph doing a great job, taking care of our team, taking care of operations, and taking care of our guests, but sometimes it still feels this way.
Recently, I lost three managers. Did it hurt me? Honestly, yes it did!
Is it because I did anything wrong? Maybe.
Is it because I did not do things right? Possibly.
Will I get past it? Definitely.
It is easy to get caught up, questioning our abilities, but sometimes life just happens. If you really think about it, you can justify anything. I can look at these three managers, and find reasons to support the fact that they are no longer with me, that it is my fault they are gone.
Maybe I did not spend enough time with them, or I did not give them the tools that they need, that I did not pay them enough money. The list can go on and on for the reasons that they left.
On the flipside, I can find all kinds of reasons that justifies why they are gone.
That they were not here for the right reasons, they did not give 100%, in which they were not cut out for leadership anyway.
The truth is, we all question ourselves as leaders, and we just won’t say it out loud. That’s what makes us good leaders.
It doesn’t mean that we need to go on a drinking spree, one of self-misery. Or, sit around our house in just our underwear watching TV all night long eating, cold pizza and not shaving. No, it means that we first self-evaluate and then look in the mirror for what we did right, and what we can possibly improve on.
The truth
One of my managers moved out of state to fill a relationship that he was pursuing.
Another manager was working on a project; she was using us as a safety net, when her true passion elsewhere. She needed to move on. The last one was someone who had his heart in the ministry. He was working on a different project for years, and he finally grew to the point where he could step out and live his passion.
If all of that did not happen within a one-month span, I probably would not have questioned my leadership ability.
Just know this, from time to time we will all question our leadership abilities. All good leaders do. The question is what do we do when we question those abilities?
Do you go to people for advice that is going to pull you down? Or, will you go to people that will give you tools to step up?
Do you bury your head and ignore it, or do you turn a different direction and live in denial?
No one said leadership is easy; in fact, they have said just the opposite.
Know this, every leader feels this way, it is not unnatural, and it does not mean you are less of a leader. If you question yourself, you are a great leader. If you question yourself and find ways to improve you are an excellent leader. If you seek help, you are an amazing leader!
Go out there and know that you are not alone, sometimes it is not about you! Just understand you have instilled greatness in others. Take on the day, and change lives!